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 Welcome to STICK A FORK IN ME I’M DONE! 

I start this story in the middle…….. Well I hope it is the middle and not the end, as I’m hoping like in all good stories there is eventually a happier ending…. It is now day 75 of lockdown and 4 months into the longest continuous period I have ever had at home with my children having never taken real maternity leave, and work being my long-term partner for too long. 

 Lockdown for me will form a significant moment in my story. I couldn’t have been happier to leave the doors of work shut behind me and find some stillness and time for reflection in what has been possibly the worst of my 41 years alive……… That’s right, that moment in life where you think, ‘STICK A FORK IN ME I’M DONE’ like a burnt-out sausage, a shell of your former-self, unrecognisable from the person you were when you started the journey………

 As a mum of three boys life can be busy at the best of times, especially, as for the most part, I have have bought them up alone whilst working full-time. I have had to make choices, and sometimes perhaps not the best ones for my family in order to sustain a career and provide for them. Having worked in different sectors of education over the past 22 years I remained apparently unprepared for the journey of navigating my own children through the education system. An unfolding story of supporting a child with special educational needs and disability, and experiencing first-hand from the other side of the desk what this means in reality.

I have been angry, furious, disgusted, worn-down, Emotionally drained, bewlidered and at times wanting to string up the education system and hold all within it to account for the experiences I have encountered on my journey. I have also been appreciative where support has been provided, and totally thankful to the few that have recognised the struggles, and most importantly whole heartedly understood…. For anyone that is reading this blog, actually understanding and saying that you understand are two very different things, and I have encountered both sides……

To date it has taken:

4 years to get to the route of the problem

4 Years of dropping everything to rescue a child from the education system when things are not going right

2 years for a medical exploration to be referred

2 years for a diagnosis of ASD and ADHD

6 months to get an EHCP

1 excellent Educational Psychologist

3 fixed term exclusions from school, impacting on the mental health of my child 

Countless bad, inappropriate, unsupported and uneducated decisions

Much conflicting recommendation and advice

Countless meetings around the head teachers table

Too many ‘risk assessments’ 

2 Early Help staff providing ‘support’ 

12 boxes of industrial size Kleenex (do you remember that time when tissues were stockpiled in lock down? – It wasn’t me!)

1 Breakdown

3 months of counselling

…………….. I could go on……………………

On reflection I cannot ignore the situations I have faced. I cannot go back in my own children’s educational journey and change the narrative, but perhaps the content included in this blog may provoke thought for those working in education, and a useful perspective for those going through these challenging journeys. 

#Education #SEND #ASD #ADHD #SENDReforms

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Looking through the lens of the parent ……….

 Perspectives and reflections from STICK A FORK IN ME I’M DONE! 

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Email:Stick-a-fork-in-me@outlook.com